This month in my Reinvent Yourself workshop, we explored the theme of building powerful relationships. At first, I thought I’d lead a session on positive relationships—the kind we usually aspire to: joyful, supportive, and easy. But something inside me nudged deeper.
I chose to focus on powerful relationships instead.
Because here’s the truth: powerful relationships aren’t always comfortable. They’re not always positive in the way we traditionally define positivity. But they are the ones that shape us, challenge us, and grow us. They can be transformative—if we’re willing to do the work.
So what’s the difference between a positive relationship and a powerful one?
A positive relationship might feel easy and pleasant. But a powerful relationship? That’s the one that asks something of you. It invites you to evolve. It reflects you to yourself—sometimes lovingly, sometimes uncomfortably—but always honestly.
In the workshop, I broke this process down into six core principles. These are the foundations of powerful relationships, as I’ve come to understand them in my work and life:
1. Get to Know Yourself
Before you can truly connect with others, you must connect with yourself. Understanding your values, your needs, your boundaries—this clarity becomes your compass. It’s the starting point for every meaningful relationship.
2. Put in the Work
Strong relationships don’t just happen. They require time, effort, and emotional labor—not just in moments of conflict but in everyday acts of care, attention, and accountability.
3. Set and Respect Boundaries
Boundaries are not barriers. They are declarations of what matters to you. They help others understand how to love and respect you well, and they give you the framework to offer the same in return.
4. Talk and Listen
True connection lives in dialogue. Not just speaking, but being heard. Not just listening, but listening to understand. In powerful relationships, both voices matter—and silence has its own wisdom, too.
5. Let Go of Control
This one is hard. We often think we can shape the outcomes of our relationships by managing others. But the truth is: you can only control yourself—your actions, your responses, your willingness to show up authentically.
6. Reflect and Learn
Every relationship—whether long-lasting or fleeting—teaches us something. When we pause to reflect, we begin to see patterns. We learn what nourishes us, what drains us, and how to show up better in the future.
Healthy relationships often include the essentials we know well: respect, honesty, trust, communication, and boundaries. But powerful relationships go a step further. They offer growth. They call us to be courageous, honest, and vulnerable—not just with others, but with ourselves.
So I ask you this: What are the powerful relationships in your life teaching you right now?
I’d love to hear your reflections.
Warmly, Clementine
